Live by the Sun

I have this prominent memory from the early 2000’s when my Mom purchased her first cell phone. I recall the exact moment sitting shot gun in her car, where I learned how to punch each number in a sequence to land on specific letters and symbols. How exciting I thought, that we could message or call anyone we knew, from anywhere we wanted. I wondered what it would be like one day when I was old enough to have my own.

Flash forward a few years, I no longer had to wonder. And now neither do the other 7.2 billion cell phone users of the world. Gone are the days of ring backs, “* $!<k* “signatures, and cursing your 2nd cousin with a scary chain mail text about Bloody Mary. Surely we are far better off with immediate answers to every question we didn’t even know we had, location sharing, and this week’s latest TikTok from Lindsay with her review of the new Kardashian Crumbl Cookie flavors – right?

Much like how this Blog makes me nostalgic for the days of 2010 Tumblr, I long for the times I was deathly afraid to open the internet browser on my enV2 to check my Facebook pokes. Our family plan could only support 15 gigs of data for the month, and if I went over that again, my ass was grass! Ah, if only I could take myself back to the days of *67 and the Black Eyed Pea’s “Boom Boom Pow” ringing from across the room when my middle school crush finally texted me back “heyy.”

I’m now ashamed to admit I just recently discovered you can see how many times you picked up your cell phone in a day, and that that number averaged at about 65 times a day for me this week. You would hope that during one of those times I picked up the phone, that I would have answered a time sensitive text from my sister, or finally called my Dad back to ask how he was doing. Unfortunately I’m ashamed to admit neither of those events occurred, but that 1 out of 65 of those pick ups, I discovered Lindsay thought Khloe Kardashians Crumbl Cookie was “literally inedible.” Moments like this make me want to chuck my phone across the room and stare at my wall for a good few minutes, thinking about what I’ve done.

Ever since I moved across the country from my friends and family for work, I’ve been avoidant, thinking about all the things I’ve missed while I’ve been away, and all the times I should just pick up the phone and call, but haven’t. I have my nose in phone so often for nonsense that the mundanity of using it to text or call my loved ones feels like too much work, like lifting my finger to select a contact to call is just too difficult. Consuming this meaningless content everyday in large doses, instead of answering my logged texts, makes me feel like Brucie on stage – scarfing down a 10lb chocolate cake with my peers watching in horror while I’m left feeling ashamed and gluttonous with a tummy ache.

Why am I telling you this? I don’t know. I guess this is my confessional, and I’m revealing I consume way too much unnecessary content. But, I’m happy to report that today I fought that thought – that sending a text felt like too much energy. Lately I’ve been thinking of my friend Drew, so I sent her a text to let her know. Drew ended up calling me the moment she received my text and we talked and laughed and caught up for hours. I can’t remember the last time I felt this great. And how silly does that sound? That I used my phone for it’s primary intended purpose…

One of the reasons I decided to start this blog was so I can document memories and recall significant moments in my life, so that later down the line I can share them with the people who love me. My late friend Julie was so great at journaling special milestones in her life, and crafting interactive books with memories for her loved ones to cherish. I’m honored to have one of her journals with me, so I can look back on her artwork and read the snippets she shared during this time in her life.

Julie, you were the one person that I could call where I felt I could be unequivocally myself, laugh my ass off, and ponder all which makes life great. I miss your voice, your laugh, our silly rants, and your supportive advice. I promise to honor you by living my life to it’s fullest, while setting aside time like this to be creative and document my present.

So I guess what I’m trying to say is… call or text the people you love and tell them so. I’m sure you have a few minutes to spare during one of the many moments a day you pick up your phone to do something unintentional.

FWD: SEND THIS BLOG MESSAGE TO 10 PEOPLE OR YOU WILL BE CURSED WITH A LIFE A BAD LUCK!!! YOU HAVE 3 HOURS!!! /s

~ $u^d4@ $4M ~